I support my local economy!


 

Yesterday, I mentioned that we're looking at our bills and budget for 2009. Typically, we don't pay too much attention to that type of stuff (yeah, I know, really smart, right?), but with the economy slowdown, it seemed like a good time to start planning on saving money and paying down our debt.

I've cut a few costs, here and there. We stopped Netflix, because we really weren't making the most use out of it. My wife's gym membership has been canceled, because she just hasn't had time to go. I even canceled the company that comes and sprays fertilizer on our shrubs and grass, figuring that the lawn guy can do the minimal stuff that we need. Of course, I can't cancel the lawn guy or the pool guy - that would mean I'd have to go out there and do it. That's ludicrous.

There's one other thing that I refuse to give up, too - my meals out.

I see eating out as my way of supporting the local economy. I'm helping to keep all of these local restaurants in business, which benefits me directly because it keeps property values higher. There's nothing that devalues property like a bunch of abandoned buildings from business that went bankrupt.

"But, wondrous Avitable," you might say, "how much help could you really be providing to the local economy just by eating meals out?"

Ah, dear reader, that's what I just calculated!

In the average month, I spend about $2,500 on dining out (not counting lunch I buy for employees). That's $30,000 a year - pretty much enough to pay for the salary of a server, hostess or cook.

Most people would say that if we just spent $300 every two weeks on groceries and ate our meals at home, we'd save almost $2,000 a month. I say that plan sucks! First, we'd have to cook, and then that would require cleaning up, too. Secondly, my absence from the restaurants locally would cause the Altamonte Springs economy to spiral downward and before long, our house would be worth less than we paid for it, and our neighborhood would be filled with all types of miscreants who park their car on the yard and drive big trucks and use food stamps.

So, instead of taking the easy way out and cooking at home, I'm making this sacrifice for the betterment of my local economy.

Some people might say that I'm selfless. Others might say I'm a hero.

Me? I think I'll go with selfless hero.

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Magaziniac


 

I think it might be time for us to reassess our magazine subscriptions. In looking at our bills and budget for the year, I compiled a complete list of all magazines to which we subscribe:

Entertainment Weekly
Maxim*
Playboy
MAD Magazine*
Mental Floss*
Smart Money
Consumer Reports
PC Gamer*
Maximum PC*
Wizard *
Forbes
Architectural Digest @
Lucky @
Travel and Leisure @
Domino @
Food and Wine @
Angeleno @
Conde Nast Traveler @
National Geographic @

* - indicates any magazines that are strictly mine
@ - indicates any magazines that are strictly Amy's.

I think I'm going to cancel Maxim - it used to be amusing to read, but it's gotten boring. Other than that, though, I can't think of another single magazine that I can consider canceling!

On the plus side, between the magazines, the 30 new comics I buy each week, and the 1-2 new novels I buy each week, I always have enough to read in my throne room. And if our power goes out, I have plenty of kindling for a fire!

I wonder if they have a magazine for magazine addicts…..


Worst post ever.


 

Link.


The stupidity of random anger


 

Does anyone else go to a movie, enjoy said movie, and then subsequently read movie reviews for that movie and get angry at the critics who give bad movie reviews of the movie that you just enjoyed?

What kind of fucking job is being a critic anyway? It's not like the person is an "objective reviewer". The job title is "critic"! So right there you're starting off on a bad foot. The job is to be negative. It's to judge. To find fault with.

A normal person reads a good book and gets involved in it, imagining the words come to life, mentally realizing the characters and the story, and when finished, cannot wait to share that book with the next person.

A critic reads a book and complains about exclamation marks and characterizations without ever letting oneself get swept away by the story and evocative imagery.

What a shitty life it must be to be a movie or food or music or book critic. Doesn't stop me from wanting to punch them in their stupid faces when I read a stupid negative review, though!

In other news, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" was excellent.


Pathetic end to a miserable year


 

Pathetic:

  • It's 10:30 and I'm thinking about going to bed. Amy went to bed a little while ago, and I've actually turned up my music to try to drown out the obnoxious noise of the fireworks going off behind us.
  • I read a comment today on someone else's blog where the commenter said that she and her husband have sex every New Year's at midnight. That just seems unduly complicated.

    "Ok, it's 11:55! Get your penis over here. Stick it in! Wait, not too fast, let's take this slow. Watch Dick Clark on TV - is the ball dropping yet? Oh, there's Madonna and the Jonas Brothers talking to Carson Daly. Faster! Oh, it's that funny Apple commercial. Slow it down - don't ruin this for me. Okay, here we go. The ball's dropping! 10! Ugh 9! Nnagh! 8! Grawf 7! Phlump! 6! Squish! 5! Sigh. Great. You came too early. Now 2009 is ruined forever. Way to go, shithead."

  • When I decide to do something, I decide at that moment. I don't wait until January 1st so I can make it a New Year's Resolution that will be quickly forgotten. Resolutions made during the rest of the year are for mature people. The rest of you can promise yourself whatever you want today.

Happy 2009.